LoveIsn'tEasy
by OwlFeather69
Summary: Sequel to Love In Many Forms. Dick Grayson is now seventeen and while he and Wally are still in love, they are struggling because of what Dick is now going through. He wants only to make Wally happy, to keep him from ever having to live another horror again. But this teenager isn't letting himself be helped. DickXWally. I don't own YJ. Please Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

_**This is a sequel to Love In Many Forms. This is in the future by a little over a year. And will be revolving around Wally and Dick again, but it will hold a lot more of Dick's story and feelings. Please enjoy! And please please review! Btw, I couldn't remember if I had Dick graduate yet or not in the other story, so in here…he didn't. Also these chapters wont be as long as my last story. Senior year at the high school started so I'm busy. And I just became president of the HOSA club. I'll keep posting tho, and keep giving updates. Warning: A teensy bit darker than Love In Many Forms.**_

* * *

It was late when Robin snuck through the front door of the apartment. It was times like these he was glad for what his friends called his "ninja" skills. He didn't want to wake up his boyfriend. So he was totally surprised when the lights flipped on and Wally West was staring at him from across the living room. The speedster was wearing nothing but a pair of gray boxers, making Robin blush. He was glad for his mask at that moment, since it covered his all-telling sapphire eyes as they looked up and down the familiar body. Robin couldn't focus his eyes right and he stumbled forward, mumbling apologies to any of the furniture he accidentally bumped into. Eventually he found the couch and fell into it.

"You were drinking…" Wally said coldly as he walked over to the seventeen year old. He peeled off his domino mask and fuzzy eyes looked up at him with guilt.

"It's not a big deal…I only…I only had a couple of drinks." Dick replied with frustration. He couldn't get his words to come out the way he wanted to. He let his head roll back on the couch.

"Damn it Dick! You can't live with me if you're going to do that shit! Bruce would have my head if he knew you kept doing this! You're wearing me out!" Wally shouted at his partner. The teen looked up and could almost feel Wally's anger with him. He kept telling him that the drinking had to stop. He kept telling him that he wanted to help him fight whatever demons were inside of him. Still, Dick couldn't get himself off of the habit. It was so nice to feel confused and happy and so light. But there was one thing Dick loved more than enough to make him never want to drink. That was Wally.

"I'm sorry Wally…I had a bad patrol night. We lost a little girl to Bane's stupid hands." Dick managed to get out, closing his eyes. He relaxed when he heard his boyfriend's sighs and then felt his arms wrap around him in a hug before gentle fingers began to help him from his uniform. This was always the part where Dick could swear he'd fallen in love all over again. Not thinking about it, Dick leaned over and planted a kiss on Wally's lips, causing the nineteen year old to blush while trying to also maintain his anger. It made Dick laugh because he knew the power he had over Wally when it came to sex. Dick had only lost his virginity to his boyfriend a year ago, while Wally lost his nearly four years earlier. But both of them learned quickly that Dick was the one who was always in the mood for a passionate night of making love. To his dismay, the speedster pushed him off.

"I'm trying to get you ready for bed dude," he said, obvious annoyance in his voice. Dick nearly laughed, knowing his lover was trying so hard to stay mad at him.

"But Wally…" he whined softly into the red-head's ear, "This is how I want you to put me to bed…"

"You're drunk. How did you even manage to get drunk and make it here as Robin without being caught…" Wally replied, finally having gotten the baby bat out of his uniform as he picked him up bridal style. He plopped the teen down on their small bed and covered him with the blanket.

"I need you now…" Dick said.

"I'll talk to you in the morning. I hope you have a killer hangover. I love you babe. Goodnight." Wally said, planting kiss on his lover's forehead, and turning over to sleep. Dick turned to face the boy's pale back and started to draw inconsistent lines on it gently. He knew he'd upset Wally and really couldn't bring himself to beg him for his attention anymore. It was his own damn fault for hurting his lover like this. With a deep sigh, Dick managed to place a light kiss on Wally's back before giving into his swimming brain and turning over, closing his eyes.

_Richard Grayson._

_Robin, the Boy Wonder._

_Richard Grayson._

_Robin, the Boy Wonder._

"_Look, it's Batman and Robin! How will that kid ever become the new Batman someday?"_

"_Richard Grayson is so hot. He's Bruce Wayne's ward, and a play boy just like him."_

_Who am I?_

_Am I really going to turn so cold and have so much pain that I can put everything on the line for a mission?_

_Am I really only Bruce Wayne's stuck up ward to the world? The circus boy who grew up surrounded by women? Even though I didn't…_

_I'm just…Dick Grayson right? My parents were killed during a circus performance and Batman gave me the opportunity to avenge them. Then I became the first side kick…the youngest of my team. Still, I've been at this longer than any of them. But…I'm also more than a hero. I'm a straight A student, a mathlete, I'm graduating this year. That's all good right?_

"_Richard Grayson is gay!"_

"_He's dating that boy, the one who's father raped and beat him all the time."_

"_He's gotta be dating him out of pity."_

"_It would explain why I could get a date with him. What a shame. That Wallace kid is only using him for his money and connections."_

"_Didn't you hear? Grayson moved into his boyfriend's little apartment in Central. He's playing house, pretending to be like everyone else…except for the gay thing."_

_Dick watched faceless people harass and judge him. They didn't know who he really was, no one did. Few people anyways. Bruce knew, Alfred knew, his parents knew, and Wally knew. To the rest of the world he was either Bruce Wayne's ward or Batman's protégé. _

"Hey wake up. I'm back from work. Have you honestly been asleep this whole time?"

Dick opened his eyes and sat up, his body feeling overused and heavy. He automatically took the cup of hot tea and plate of cut up watermelon from his boyfriend. He almost smiled at the sight of Wally dressed for his job as an assistant at Central's nursing home. He was wearing all white and it made Dick think he was looking at an angel for a second, before realizing it was just his hangover kicking in.

"What time is it? Your work started at five in the morning right?" he asked before sipping the hot liquid.

"Yeah. It's now four in the afternoon," Wally answered before sitting on the edge of the bed, "Your drinking…you're really starting to scare me Dick. It's gotten so bad…" he said sadly.

Dick gripped the hot mug in his hands and winced at the words. He hated disappointing Wally and putting him through more pain than he had to go through already. He was supposed to be there for him, be the one person who wouldn't upset him. Now he was the only thing hurting him and Dick felt terrible for it.

"I know it's the coping method you've chosen. I know you've gotten a lot of hell from the media for our relationship and from school and friends. I know it's hard for you to be the ward of a billionaire and the side kick to the Batman. I just know that drinking is not the way to fixing anything. It's exactly how I was when I went out having sex with anyone I met or when I'd turn to drugs." Wally continued.

"I want to stop…you know I do." Dick replied quietly. Wally kissed the boy's forehead.

"If it happens again…I can't keep it from Bruce anymore Dick. I can get into some serious trouble and so can you. What if the media gets ahold of this? We've been caught drinking before remember?" he asked. Dick nodded, thinking back to times Wally took him out and let him drink just a little too much.

"I know. We're always in the news. Well Bruce is and I am. You just happen to be my boyfriend…" he pointed out. Wally rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm going to be blinded if one more camera snaps in my face." He joked lightly.

Dick knew Wally was still getting used to a life of cameras outside of hero business. Wally didn't complain too much about it, but Dick wouldn't blame him if he did. Sometimes he wished his own face was a mask he could just take off. It felt like a mask. Even dating Wally, Dick had to pretend to flirt with women and not act like Wally meant more to him than a good time and an escape from his life of "glamour". It frustrated him to know end. It always made him feel silly though, because all he had ever wanted was to make Wally's life easier, not harder.

Ever since they mind melded a year ago and Dick saw the terrible things that had happened to Wally, felt what his lover felt, he was always amazed with the way Wally stayed so positive all the time. He worked hard to make money, pay for school, and tried his best not to ask anyone for favors. Dick wondered if Wally ever saw him as a joke like everyone else. He knew Wally wanted to take care of him, he knew Wally never wanted Dick to pay for anything. Dick knew it was a pride thing so he would only take Wally out on expensive dates about once every couple of months.

It wasn't that Dick was insecure in their relationship, in fact, he was the more daring of the two. Especially when it came to the intimate part of their relationship. He knew how to be in charge, hell he could make the speedster melt with the batting of his dark eye lashes. He was well aware that Wally loved him more than anything, he'd told him how he was love with him since he was thirteen years old. Dick never doubted it. He thought about the first time he realized he wanted to be more than best friend's with Wally. When he'd found out about his boyfriend's home life and subsequently about Wally's sexuality and the feelings he had towards him, Dick had had an insane desire to just kiss him. He did. And while Wally was gone, he had done a lot of thinking. He wasn't sure if he was gay or if he'd like being with a man at all, but what he knew was that some new feelings had been stirred inside of him after that kiss. He smiled to himself thinking about how he'd built up the courage to officially ask Wally out on a date and then having to convince him that it was okay.

Dick couldn't be any happier with the choice he'd made to date his best friend. Wally was always respectful, never forced him to do anything he wasn't ready for. Even Bruce had approved of him so it was pretty amazing. Bruce took the time to sit Dick down and really give him "the talk" since all of his real life flirting had been staged. Mostly. Dick wasn't totally innocent with the women he picked up, how could he be? Still, he wasn't anywhere near experienced, especially the way Wally was. He'd told Bruce that he was planning on losing his virginity to Wally. He'd told Bruce he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to impress Wally after how many partners he'd been with and Bruce tried to talk to him about all of it. Of course Bruce didn't know how to give a talk for two dating boys.

"Anyways," Wally's voice brought Dick back from his thoughts, "I'm sorry I put you through so much stress babe. School must suck for you." He said scratching the back of his head. Dick snorted at the comment.

"It's not like I wasn't considered a freak before. Hello? How many other kids were circus performers who got adopted by a billionaire? It's not like being gay and drunk are what made school suck in the first place." He explained with a shrug. He explained to Wally he was feeling sick and went to the bathroom to take a shower and try not to throw up.

_You have got to stop this._

_Stop drinking._

_Stop._

_Stop._

_You're hurting people._

_Bruce is worried about you and suspicious._

_Wally is heart broken._

_Remember how you felt when you saw the effects of his drugs? _

_The aftermath of him being loose with people?_

_He doesn't want to see you go through those kinds of things._

_If you can endure training sessions with Batman, you can stop drinking._

_Stop feeling so sorry for yourself._

_You're the freaking boy wonder!_

Dick sighed and ran shampoo through his charcoal black hair and rubbed a bar of soap over his body. He was glad he could at least get the smell of Gotham's dirty darkness from his body. He couldn't help but sink to the floor of the shower, putting his head between his knees and closing his eyes. He was tired and nauseas. He tried to breathe and concentrate on standing again, but his body just wouldn't allow for it.

Dick opened his eyes and looked at himself. His inner thighs were permanently marked with puffy burn scars that Wally had left on him from when they mind melded after a spell was cast to make Wally's dad not reveal his secret identity. Dick had never blamed Wally for what happened, but he knew Wally blamed himself every time Dick took his clothes off. Wally had a hard enough time looking at the faded scars from the time Dick had been blown up by the joker. Wally considered that event his fault too. Dick had ended up in a coma, causing Wally to turn to drugs again. If only Wally knew the guilt Dick felt for that. He tries to distract Wally whenever he's undressed so the speedster won't feel so bad. Usually he succeeds by not flirting and seducing him.

Seduction was always something that came easily to Dick, even before he cashed in his v card to Wally. He was pretty good at it with all of the cocky arrogance he'd had to put on for ladies when he was out as Richard Grayson. He loved being in charge of the sex in his relationship with Wally. This way Dick always knew when he was going to get laid. He couldn't imagine how nervous it made Wally feel, but he smirked at the idea. The only time he couldn't get Wally to sleep with him was when he was drunk. It had happened a couple of times in the past and it completely changed Wally's moral code. If Dick was drunk, he was not getting sex of any kind from his boyfriend.

Dick smiled absentmindedly at the scars on his body, they were reminders of how much Wally loved him. How much he loved Wally. Of course, he would never say that to his best friend. Wally would probably be disgusted at Dick for thinking that way. Dick listened, hearing the bathroom door open, but unable to look up. His head just felt too heavy at the moment and if he moved, he thought he might throw up. He didn't want to throw up, knowing Wally was in the bathroom now.

"Are you okay?" Wally asked, drawing the curtains back and turning off the shower to stare at his boyfriend sitting on the shower floor. Dick slightly shook his head as he watched the last of the water run down the drain. He blushed as he felt a large towel come down on him. Wally was drying him off, starting with his back and shoulders, then roughly rubbing it over his soaked hair before prying Dick from the tub. In a slippery ungraceful heap, the two boys landed with a thud on the tiled floor. Wally half smiled and pulled a wrapped up boy wonder into his lap. Dick leaned his head back onto Wally's shoulder and let his blue eyes rest on the speedster's collar bone, where he began kissing slowly.

"I love you Wally," he whispered.

* * *

It had been eight days since Dick had last seen Wally. He and Bruce were now undercover in Bludhaven looking for a man who was supposed to be in charge of a trafficking ring there. He wasn't sure if Bruce was going to solve this one anytime soon though because this city was crawling with criminals and Batman and Robin hadn't quit taking them down since they got there, almost having no spare time. Tonight though, Dick had decided to take things into his own hands. Batman and Robin sightings were creating a mess for the two heroes and so gangs were trying to lower their profiles. He couldn't just swing around on buildings and wait for someone to slip up. He had to find something new out for himself, because if he didn't, he was going to lose it. Since Bruce was monitoring him, he hadn't been able to touch a drink.

Beating the crap out of bad guys was his substitute but now he wanted the real deal. The man who was trafficking people around the city. Normally, Bruce would let the police handle it, but women who were apart of this ring were disappearing and ending up dead every night for the last two months. Being Dick Grayson, he knew he couldn't just walk around in his normal clothes. Instead, he settled for a pair of faded jeans, a black shirt with a dark blue jacket, and worn out sneakers. Dick snickered as he drove down the street when he thought about how he had "borrowed" a beat up old van. His plan was to act like a potential customer and see what kind of information he could get. He knew he had to hurry because if Bruce was right about this suspect, there would be another murder tonight.

Not many people took these deaths very seriously. Most figured it came with the territory of becoming a prostitute, and not many people cared for these girls. The ones found dead were always girls who had severed ties to their families. There was no one to miss them or put out a report for them. Dick pulled over near a side walk like he'd done four other times that night, where he could see activity going on and looked at the time on his cell phone. It was just before midnight and he shivered with the idea of what could happen. There were several women parading around this area. He looked up, and having known wearing sun glasses would be suspicious at night, he had opted for a pair of mud brown contact lenses. With an implying grin, he caught the attention of a gal who looked as if she could have once been the most beautiful creature on Earth. As she drew closer, it took Dick a lot of nerve not to look disgusted. She was thin and pale, almost jaundice in color. Her face was loaded with red lipstick and purple eye shadow. Her dull red hair was matted and pulled back into a messy pony tail. Her eyes definitely caught Dick's attention, as they were the same color green as Wally's, but not as vibrant and definitely sunken in. They looked hopeless and withdrawn while the woman smiled at him as she got into his passenger seat. She was wearing a cut jean skirt and a braless pink tube top. Dick could see the off color on her arm where she'd tried to slather makeup over injection spots. She didn't hide her bruises or cuts though and he wondered why.

"How much?" Dick asked her.

"Fifty dollars." The woman answered, extending her bony hand. Dick pulled out the money and handed it to her, then held up three hundred dollars and fanned them in front of her. She looked shocked at first but then narrowed her eyes and looked at him.

"What do you want? You ain't no cop are ya? I don't play these kind of games." she snapped, her hand going for the car handle. Dick had already locked it, and as much as he hated scaring her, he was sure it was necessary.

"I'm not a cop. I just thought that you could give me more of your time and I'll pay you for it. That doesn't even count the motel room and new dress I'll buy for you. What's your name?" Dick played calmly. The woman's body stayed stiff, but she seemed less put off by the teen.

"It's Bunny…what kind of time could you want from me to offer me so much nice things?" she replied.

"I just want you to show me around here. I'm new and I wasn't sure where I could…get a fix." Dick answered, remembering how Wally had referred to the use of drugs. "What's your real name?" he continued.

"It's…Jessica. I can take you to someone, but he aint gonna 'preciate me bringun a cocky sonofabitch like you. You don't look like someone who uses." The red head answered, smacking her lips together.

"I'm new at it. But I need the best." Dick told her, shrugging like it wasn't a big deal. Jessica looked uneasy so he brought his hand to her cheek, pulling her face to his.

"Babe," he whispered against her ear, "Don't worry about it, I'll protect you." He let go of her in a fluid motion and nearly chuckled at the sight of her flustered face. She probably wasn't used to the gentle type of men at all. Dick unlocked the car door, trying to show her his trust. She looked as if she were going to take the bait when suddenly two hands started to bang against the window glass, frightening both Dick and Jessica. The hooded person pulled the door open and threw the prostitute out, yelling at her to take her money and run. Of course, Jessica did. The hood was thrown back and the now blonde woman, though younger than Jessica, was looking at Dick.

"You stupid filthy pig!" she shouted. Dick's jaw dropped as he realized it. He was staring into a pair of very familiar ice blue eyes.

"Maggie?" he asked calmly. The lady lost her footing for a second and she looked closer at the teen.

"Richard?" she replied, eyes widening. She looked around then jumped in the seat and closed the door.

"What the hell are you doing? Did Wally send you to spy on me?" she hissed.

"Are you kidding me? Why are you even in Bludhaven Maggie? By the way, thanks for letting her get away." Dick groaned.

"I'm trying to help these girls! What are you doing here? Aren't you gay? Did Wally dump you or something?" the witch girl growled.

"First of all, I'm Richard Grayson. I don't have to go pay prostitutes to sleep with me. I can screw any girl I want, which I don't. I'm with Wally, but I'm under cover for…you know…and we're trying to catch whoever is murdering these women." Dick explained. Maggie sighed a breath of relief as she leaned against her seat.

"Looks like we're on the same side." She said.

"I know helping these girls means a lot to you…Wally told me you used to live here and…work…here. But I don't want you getting hurt…" Dick told her. Maggie rolled her eyes.

"I can take care of myself. Look, let me help you. You need someone who can show you around." She offered. Dick thought about it. He knew that he didn't need her. He was trained by the world's greatest detective. There wasn't really anything Maggie could do for him that he couldn't do for himself, and he had a feeling she knew it too. But for whatever reason, he wanted to know what this woman was up to. Besides, he knew Wally cared about her safety, even if they didn't talk anymore. He felt like he needed to keep an eye on her.

"Fine. You know the guy running this thing?" he asked.

"No. But, I can get you inside. Look, the women are nothing. The person who's pimping them is keeping a closer eye on his drug supply. My guess is that he's got beef with a rival, who's been sending men here to hurt these girls. There's a message that's trying to get across." Maggie answered. Dick nodded, no longer listening to the red lips speak. He spotted a man coming out of an alley way, with two other's following him. They were walking towards Dick's car and had already spotted him looking their way.

"Maggie, shut up." He hissed. Maggie saw the men, as they cupped their eyes to peer into the window. Dick nearly yelped when Maggie began to unfasten his jeans and lower her head. Dick, flustered, looked up to see the men grinning at Dick and one gave the other an elbow to the side before they started to walk off.

"Sorry," Maggie snickered as she popped up, "had to make it look interesting in here."

"You're a little too good at pretending to give head. Do you know those two?" Dick asked, zipping up the fly of his pants. Maggie grimaced.

"Yeah. One's my boss." She groaned. Dick raised an eyebrow in question.

"I've been under cover for the last three days." Maggie shrugged.

"Don't they know your dad is a cop by now?" Dick questioned. Maggie pushed her blonde waves behind her head to reveal an amber colored amulet.

"They don't even know it's me. To them, I am Candy, a dark skinned, black haired, emerald eyed beauty. I made it so they couldn't resist hiring me." She explained.

"Nice magic skills. How come I can see you?" Dick asked. Maggie shrugged.

"Maybe because you're trustworthy or something. Don't know exactly. But come on, I'll introduce you." Maggie said as she hopped out of the car. Dick cringed when she took off her coat to reveal a cheap, tight red dress. It barely went past her thighs and it looked…dirty. She definitely knew what she was doing and he wasn't sure that was a good thing. He could just see Wally flipping out if he saw this. He still wasn't sure if he was going to tell the speedster at all.

Maggie led Dick to where the two men had gone, which was a small, exclusive strip club. Maggie grabbed two red wine glasses from a tray and handed one to Dick, unaware of the fact that he was petrified by it. He couldn't tell if he wanted to chug it or chuck it. He settled for starting with a sip and following Maggie to a booth where the two men sat. He wasn't sure what the disguised girl had whispered into the older man's ear, but he knew whatever it was, it worked. The man smiled mischievously and Maggie gestured for Dick to come sit with them. He did, ruffling his ebony hair as he sat.

"So," the older man said, "Candy here tells me you want in on the business?" Dick nodded.

"That's right. I'm your guy. I'm smart, I can fight, I can sell." He assured them. The two men looked at each other and laughed. One made a gesture over Dick's head and a girl walked up to the booth. She was wearing a pink wig and a pink skirt. There was nothing covering her chest or torso. She smiled, holding out an old shoe box to the oldest man. He took it, thanked the girl, and waved her on his way. Dick wasn't surprised when the man slid the box across the table at him and he opened it to peek at the contents. Bag after bag of the white snowflakes that Wally used to carry around with him.

"We'll start you with that. You see those all, bring me the money by the end of the week, and I'll move you up." The man explained.

"Right. So who am I selling for?" Dick tried. The two men cracked up laughing.

"That's on a need to know basis. Now kid, what's your name?" the oldest asked.

"My name…is Jason…" he answered. Maggie looked at him with a tilted eyebrow and he barely rolled her eyes at her with an answer. The oldest man held his hand out and Dick shook it, accepting the deal.

* * *

"I could've driven." Dick said as they pulled up to the motel parking lot. Maggie snorted at the comment.

"Right. You were sipping wine like you got dumped. Give me a second." She said, suddenly unzipping her dress. Dick blushed and looked away as Maggie wiggled into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She then walked Dick to his motel room. They sat on the bed.

"I'm telling Wally you're here…" Dick mumbled, not looking away from the shoe box he held.

"I figured as much. But I know you won't do it until you get this guy. If you tell Wally now, he'll find a way to stop us both from investigating." Maggie replied, stretching and laying down.

"Besides," she continued with a sigh, "He doesn't need to come speeding over here and have to be reminded of what happens to people who are used for sex with drug addictions."

"Wally never…sold himself." Dick said defensively, unaware of the way he was glaring at the blond woman.

"Maybe not for money, or drugs even. But he did. Every time his father would come to him and he'd go out and have sex, he'd do it in exchange for a moment of feeling something else. I know you love him Grayson, but until you have to give away your body for survival, I don't expect you to understand." Maggie said, getting up to leave. Dick threw her some cab money and locked the door after she left. He took out his contacts and sat back down. He opened the shoe box and pulled out a baggie.

"Wally…" he whispered. He knew Maggie was right. He wouldn't ever understand what these women who were being murdered and beaten every day went through. He'd see plenty of it to recognize it, but not to empathize with it. Not truly. He felt disgusted with himself when a pang of jealousy went through him. He was jealous of Maggie. She understood Wally's choices a lot more than Dick did. Shutting the powder back into the box and tossing it under the bed, he crashed back into his pillows in frustration. He may not know what it was like to get beaten by a loved one, have his body used, but there was one thing he did understand as he fell asleep dizzily. That was addiction. And suddenly the wine on his own breath made him sick.


	2. Dick's Mission

_**Thanks for the reviews you guys! Btw, I did do the Jason thing on purpose. Lol thought it would give Dick's "character" a darker image. I love writing for you all and as long as you enjoy the story, I will be more than happy to put aside time to work on it, but I still have school so that's why this took long BUT I do not abandon my stories! Love you all! Read and Review please!**_

* * *

Dick had sent the shoe box of drugs to his mentor, in return he was given the right amount of money for them. It was three days since Maggie had gotten him into the business and now Dick was ready to report back with the money, hoping he'd gain the boss's favor. He couldn't be seen too much with Maggie, as she was supposed to just be a girl he'd picked up and coerced into giving him some information. Tonight, he planned on everything going smoothly and Maggie was currently in his motel bathroom getting into character. He decided to take the time to call Wally from his personal cell phone.

"_Hey, how's the mission going? Are you safe?" Wally asked him when he answered the phone._

"_Hoping to make a break through tonight. I'm fine Wally. Nothing to worry about. I just missed you."_

"_I miss you too Dick. I hope you find this scum bag soon so you can hurry up and get back to me. You…haven't been drinking right?" Wally asked the last part hesitantly. Dick thought about it, the only time he drank during this mission was the night Maggie had taken him to the strip club._

"_No, I haven't. I did get to see a lot of poor women though, and I have to say, the idea of fuzzing up my brain wasn't out of thought…it's devastating here Walls."_

"_I know…sometimes people go take desperate measures to get their fix or their money. But remember, not every girl feels bad about it. And whoever is pimping them around definitely doesn't feel bad about it. Those girls are merchandise. Usually the women are backed in a corner, they won't be easy to break…" then added with a chuckled, "then again…you are Dick Grayson."_

"_Look…I need to tell you something…" Dick replied, thinking about the blonde woman he was temporarily partnered with as she walked out of the bathroom._

"_What?" Wally asked, noticing the pause in his lover's voice._

"_Uh," Dick met Maggie's knowing eyes, "nothing…"_

"_You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. Call me later babe. I love you. Be safe please…" Wally said sternly. Dick nodded at first, forgetting the speedster couldn't see him._

"_I love you too Wally, be home soon." _He said before hanging up. He looked Maggie up and down. She was wearing a black skirt with torn fish net leggings. Her shirt was a sheer, midriff showing red one. Dick couldn't help but smirk at her. She'd definitely gotten the stereotypical look down of a low end prostitute.

Dick himself was wearing a pair of dark jeans and a white shirt with a red jacket. He'd honestly bought the jacket because it reminded him of Wally and he always felt safer having something like it. He'd tell himself at night that all he had to do was pick up the phone and Wally would be there in no time to hold him if ever he needed it, but he knew he couldn't call. This was his mission and he was determined to finish it. Besides, he did not want to have the boy he loved face the terrors going on in Bludhaven. Dick was used to the dangers of Gotham and the dark, dirty secrets it harbored. It's sister city was just how it used to be there before Batman came to town. While Dick wouldn't argue that Wally was a great hero, and could handle many sights, he didn't want a place like Bludhaven to ring to close to the speedster's heart. At least in Central, Wally could look up at the sky and smile because it was clear and blue.

Looking again at Maggie, Dick felt a familiar twinge of guilt in his chest. He knew Wally would be hurt once he found out his ex boss was in Bludhaven with him. Hopefully it would be worth it, hopefully Dick could stop the trafficking in this area and go home with good news. Batman hadn't been too keen on letting the teen go alone, but Dick had made it clear he wasn't asking for permission. These days, Bruce and Dick were having some conflicts as far as style went. Dick couldn't take the extremes that his mentor was taking to complete a mission. It was definitely causing a split in their relationship and Dick had started branching off on his own.

"You ready Candy?" he teased grabbing his backpack, his Robin uniform tucked away in it. He quickly threw in his pair of brown contacts and Maggie put her hair up in a sloppy pony tail to complete her look.

"Let's go…Jason. Why Jason anyways?" the girl replied, hooking her arm in his.

"Felt right," was all Dick told her in answer, "Look, we have to be careful. I did some digging. A newbie like me came to work for these guys the same night I did. He's dead now. Turned up in a river for not reporting the money he owed them."

Maggie nodded, taking in the news.

Dick felt a bit naked without his mask or sunglasses, but knew a cocky grin would suffice for the night. He needed to play the part of a boy who didn't realize what he was getting himself into. He needed to make his superiors believe he was ignorant enough to be controlled, but charismatic enough to do the kind of business they asked of him. The money he'd planned to give them (each bill loaded with a personalized bat tracer) was tucked carefully in his jeans and soon, the couple were at the familiar strip club. Maggie made sure to play her role carefully as well, swooning over Dick, but not afraid to smile at a potential "client" that came her way. Dick was a little worried, letting Maggie wander off with a man who looked three times her size and was only interested in one thing. But he also was aware that there was nothing he could do about it and had to trust she could take care of herself. Mistaking his look of concern with jealousy, the two superiors he'd met the first night exchanged grins and then gestured to a girl in the back corner of the club.

She was about Dick's height, maybe even his age. Her body was thin, white like all the others, but her hair seemed real. It was midnight black and draped in straight strands down her shoulders. She had large glossed lips and Dick noticed a purple bruise around her right eye she'd tried to cover up with makeup. There were also familiar injection points on her arms, but along with those were the scabbed over lines across her wrists, proving her unhappiness. It took a lot for Dick to act indifferent about her condition as big dark half lidded eyes looked at him mischievously before her head dipped to the crook of his neck.

"Now you can forget about your other gal you've taken a liking to for now," the older man said. Dick tried not to cringe away as the pair of lips started to nibble on his neck. He inwardly prayed they wouldn't mark him, but he swore he could feel the blood rush to his skin. After successfully relaxing to the clinginess of the barely dressed woman who was nearly in his lap, Dick pulled out the money from his back pocket and set it in the middle of the table. Smiling something devious, the older man snatched it up and laughed.

"Good job kid, looks like you're ready for the next thing. Names Truth by the way. This here is Mink." He informed Dick, pointing to the younger, lighter haired man next to him. Dick realized that man hardly talked at all.

"Truth huh?" Dick thought about the irony, "Okay, what do you want me to do?" he asked, then squirmed, feeling his "company" dip under the table in between his legs. He tried to act nonchalant about it, but it took a lot of tongue biting not to jump away. He mentally slapped himself, remembering he was the playboy kid of playboy Bruce Wayne. He knew how to handle this, he knew how to flirt and how to act shallow. But his mind kept wandering to Wally, not wanting to hurt him in any way.

"We'll give you another box. Sell it in two days. A long with that, we'll be giving you a small sample of…escorts. Three girls, two boys. You have to make a profit off of them. Then you can meet the boss. Understand?" the in-charge man explained. Dick gulped, partly from the fact that he knew his jeans and boxers had been popped open by the prostitute under the table, and partly because now he wasn't sure how exactly he planned to deal with selling human beings.

"Right…where…ex…actly," he said between breaths, feeling the quick workings of his escort's hand, "do you want me to keep them?"

The oldest man shrugged, "Wherever you like, just make sure they're going to be useful to the boss. Do we have a deal?" he asked, extending his hand. Dick jumped back, his hand now pressed against the dark haired girl's forehead to keep her from lowering her mouth onto him, he quickly zipped and buttoned his jeans before shaking hands with his superior and following a new man towards a back exit. The man was blonde, tall, and fit. He was wearing a white suit and what looked like real diamonds in both of his ears.

He led Dick to an alley where the said amount of humans were waiting for their new pimp. Dick shivered at the realization it was him. It didn't take long to load them into the back of his van. Maggie sat with them, checking them over for any wounds, and besides a few injection sites on them, she didn't find much.

"They're just kids Jason. Hardly old enough to be out of high school. And they're newbies. It's good for us." She pointed out as they drove along. Dick pulled over behind a boarded up convenience store and looked at the kids. They had to be around Wally's age and it made him sad to wonder why they would stoop to this.

"Candy, you got a place for them?" he asked, eyeing the undercover prostitute. She gave him a thumbs up.

"No worries boss. They're safe with me." She assured him, leading the group from the van. Dick hesitantly trusted woman to take them somewhere safe where they weren't going to squeal and then told her to meet him back at the motel room in a few hours.

* * *

It was around one in the morning when Dick examined the purple bruises on his bare neck, sticking his tongue out at the sight. He could've sworn it was a lot easier back when he let gold digging bimbos suck on his skin than when a girl who was being forced and addicted to drugs was doing it. Right now though, all he wanted to do was scrub it all away. He wanted a drink was what he really wanted. Instead, he settled for a long hot shower. He missed Wally and he missed Bruce. All in all, he missed everyone. These days, he felt like he hardly saw the team. His missions had been getting more dangerous, more time consuming, and more emotionally exhausting than any had been for Mount Justice. Dick ran his soapy fingers through his hair, closing his eyes. They stung from having the murky contacts in all day. He heard a knock on the door.

"How long are you gonna be in there Grayson? This kind of…can't wait!" the witch exclaimed. Dick groaned and turned off the water.

"I'm sorry, did you get a disgusting hand job from a prostitute?" he said irritably as he opened the door. He had a white towel around his waist and was now rubbing one over his hair, letting it rest there and drape over his shoulders. Dick froze at the sight in front of him. Next to a nervous Maggie was a very annoyed looking red head.

"Wally…" he breathed, blue eyes wide, "what are you doing here?"

"I heard that a boy working for the same ring you do was killed. And someone didn't call to tell me it wasn't him. So I had to make sure you were okay," Wally answered calmly, eyeing Dick. Then his gaze lowered, and Dick slapped a hand over the marks that littered his neck.

"Instead," Wally continued, "I found my ex boss wearing a whore's costume and shacked up with my boyfriend…who has hickies on his neck…and got a hand job from a prostitute?" the last part was growled out.

"It's not like that Wally…" Dick tried to assure him, "honestly, there wasn't much I could do about it. My cover would've been blown."

"Right. So did you let the crack head whore suck you off too?" Wally hissed. Then before Dick could reply, he watched a pale hand slap across the speedster's face. Both boys turned their attention to the witch in front of them. A red aura they'd hadn't seen in a long time was surrounding her.

"Knock it off Wally. You know, last time I checked, you were once a 'crack head whore' who would screw anyone for a moment to feel better about your pathetic life." She told him calmly. That's when Dick realized she hadn't slapped Wally to defend him, she'd done it to defend the girl. He felt guilty now, and he was sure Wally did too. The boy's face was as red as his hair and Dick didn't know if it was from the slap or shame or a mixture of both.

"Wally," Dick said quietly, "I'm sorry it happened. But…this mission is important. Please forgive me."

"Guess you're a little more like Batman than you thought." Wally replied harshly. Dick didn't reply, but it hit him hard in the heart and he thought maybe at that moment he could throw up. It was definitely the last thing he needed to hear, especially from Wally. He didn't blame him though, how could he? But while Dick hated to admit it, his actions had been like his mentor's. At the time, he had been solely focused on his mission.

To his surprise, Wally pulled him into a hug. He wasn't sure what to do, and so remained stiff in the tightening grip.

"I'm glad you're safe…" Wally mumbled, then looked at Maggie, "What are you doing here anyways? Dressed like that?" he asked, pointing to her offending outfit. The woman popped a hip and snorted at the younger adult.

"I was here by myself, trying to help these girls. Then your boy toy showed up and hey, I figured the boy wonder could use some help from a girl who's been on the inside." And Maggie continued to explain to Wally what the pair had been doing over the last couple of days. She also explained to him that her powers had been growing and she'd been practicing using them and that the amulet she wore hid her identity from the bad guys.

"Look, we have to show up with some money from these kids we're supposed to be parading around and if we don't have it witnessed, the boss is definitely going to wonder what's up." She said to Dick.

"I can help," Wally offered, "I'll be a customer in the right place at the right time. We can stage it."

"Sure. Who do you want? We have three girls and two boys…" Dick joked dryly, crossing his arms over his bare chest. Wally shrugged him off and zipped to Dick's bed and back, now holding the full shoe box. He peaked inside and gave an impressed whistle.

"You two haven't…Touched this stuff right? It's potent looking." he started, eyeing the pair. Dick shook his head.

"No way, not after seeing what you went through."

Wally then looked at Maggie, who gave him her answer simply by a raised, challenging eyebrow. Dick watched the way his lover eyed the white collection. He wondered what was going through the older boy's mind, what memories he was suffering. What memories he was missing. Dick thought he could compare the situation to his own. Wally hated the drugs because he knew they were bad for him, but Dick was sure the speedster missed the feelings that the fine powder could give him. Even though Wally's life was better now, he would never be completely free of his past, of his father and mother.

* * *

"Are you still awake little bird?" Wally whispered to the boy who's head was rested on his chest. Dick barely nodded. He was concentrating on Wally's breathing patterns, something that always helped put him to sleep before. Now though, he just wanted to stay awake and experience it. For some reason, he felt like if he didn't stay awake, the red headed boy would disappear. He glanced over to the other bed in the motel room, Maggie was asleep in it. Wally had insisted Dick have her stay near them. Dick knew it was important to keep the woman safe…if only for his lover's sake.

"I know things have been hard for you…" Wally whispered, running circles with his finger on Dick's naked back, "I know you haven't been able to touch a drink. I know you and Bruce are having some…disagreements…and I know walking into this new world is frightening. Trust me, it took being on drugs and having a one track mind towards sex to stop feeling so disgusted with this lifestyle. You can see the irony there."

"Is it hard for you? To be here?" Dick asked. Though he already knew the answer. Wally didn't answer him, and Dick knew it was for his own sake. Wally still tended to treat the acrobat as if he was something fragile that needed protection. But Dick never argued with it, he knew it was something Wally needed to do, a way to have some control. Dick hated being bare around the speedster sometimes just because it meant Wally would have to look at the scars on his body. It wasn't like Wally didn't have scars of his own, but he definitely didn't have them so severely as Dick did. Wally could heal fast and Wally's arch enemy wasn't the Joker.

As if to tell him that he wasn't mad at him anymore, Wally pulled Dick up to sit him on his waist, and then brought his face to his for a long kiss. Dick broke away, glancing over at a sleeping Maggie, then back to his boyfriend, who's eyes held a glint in them. Wally held a single finger up to his lips to tell Dick they should be quiet, then grinned. Dick took the hint…and the challenge. For him, it felt like he hadn't been with his lover in ages. He was more than willing to entertain the speedster.

Dick pressed drawn out kisses along the boy's neck, playfully nipping him along the way. In the early part of their relationship, Dick had been nervous during intimacy, afraid he'd mess things up. Wally had already been sexually active for at least a year before they got together and Dick hadn't even ever considered a relationship with another boy. Hell, he was supposed to be taking after his guardian in the "womanizing" department. Wincing at the thought of his earlier encounter at the strip club, Dick mentally compared the kisses of a woman to a man. Wally's lips weren't as soft as a woman's, and not as gentle. Wally's kisses were sweeter though, instead of full of the greed that the women Dick had kissed were. Dick wasn't entirely innocent, not limiting himself to only kissing women, but being with a man was definitely a new thing. There was no lipstick to taste, only slightly salty skin. There were no breasts to fondle and the kind of foreplay Dick had been used to was not going to be helpful in such a situation. Not once had Wally ever complained about having to teach Dick the ropes. Not once did he comment on anything Dick had considered a mistake.

Dick twirled pink budded nipples under alternating fingers and his tongue. He listened to the muffled, struggling breathing of his boyfriend and he couldn't help but smile at his early success. He had to bite his own lip when the older boy's hands cupped his ass and ran down the back of his thighs. Dick smirked and dove under the sheets to pop open Wally's boxers.

_I know he came at a bad time…_

_But I've never needed him so badly…_

_He's proof these girls and boys can get through these problems…_

_He and Maggie are proof of that._

_So maybe that means I can get through it too…_

_I'm afraid when he's not here._

_I'm afraid when I feel alone, but at the same time…_

_I'm afraid when there are people around me._

_I can't lose Wally. I still hate myself…_

_For not realizing my best friend was being hurt for so long…_

_For not realizing my best friend was in so much pain…_

_That he was in love with me…and I was oblivious to it all._

_So caught up in my missions…so…_

_So…_

_Like Batman…_

_No…_

_Not like him._

_He doesn't miss a single step._

_I do._

_I'm the one who messes up._

_But I can't be like Batman._

* * *

Dick nodded his head to the young girl standing on the sidewalk. All he really wanted to do at that second was put a blanket around her exposed body and take her to a shelter. He'd been informed that most of these teens had aged out of local orphanages. Dick shivered at the thought of what could have happened if he hadn't been taken in by Bruce. It's possible he would've grown up with a personal vendetta against the world, that bitterness and pain would rule his soul. He wondered if this was the lifestyle he'd have turned to.

Dick had watched the girl and his other "employees" all do lines of cocaine before going to "work." It sickened him and besides this girl he'd staged to go Wally, the others were out selling themselves. He even had to act like they were his property, make them believe they were nothing. Right now, he hoped he wouldn't have to do it again. One of the men that Dick knew had been following his "business" moves, was standing nearby. The man wasn't aware that Dick knew exactly where he was and when he was there. So now Dick watched the young girl walk over to where Wally was waiting in a car. The girl had to be about the same age as Wally and she would've been a lovely thing if it wasn't for her greasy black hair, glossed brown eyes, and thin body. Her name was Jasmin, but her stage name was "Diamond."

It bothered Dick a little bit that this was where Wally had to put on his well-practiced flirting skills. It was Wally's job to make things look right, especially if someone came over to check on him. Still, after what happened with the prostitute yesterday, Dick wasn't going to let himself freak out. Wally was no longer the type of boy who went around screwing whoever came his way. He had done more than prove that to Dick…not that Dick had ever needed it proven to him. And if he did, he was a detective after all.

Diamond was a shy girl, but right now, she was definitely also trying to prove herself to her boss…Dick…or "Jason." Dick watched her get into the car and then pressed a finger to his ear. He'd set up a microphone in the car and given Wally an ear piece as well so they'd have a line of communication. He'd done the same thing for Maggie as she was trying to keep an eye on the other teens and not to mention keep up her own charade. It was times like these that Dick realized how much he'd come to rely on the communications that having M'gann around could provide. Against Wally's wishes, Dick had a beer in his hand. He swore it was for his image, but they both knew he'd just gone too long without one. Putting the cool metal can to his lips, he listened Wally.

_Wally: You're kind of young to be in such a ratty place like this. _

_Diamond: I can be as old as you want me to be baby._

_Wally: Haha, you think you can handle me? I'm not into children…_

_Diamond: I'm no child and baby, I know exactly what I'm doing…_

_Wally: Wow, damn. _

"Hey!" Dick hissed into his mic, "You're gay remember?"

_Wally: That doesn't change how this kissing feels…and so are you by the way…_

_Diamond: What?_

_Wally: Nothing, beautiful._

_Dick snorted, "Says who? You're the only guy I've ever been with." He heard a laugh on the other line._

_Wally: Hey wait a minute babe, slow down. I like to get to know who I hire._

_Diamond: That's…unusual. You sure you don't want to just…like…do this? Damn, you're pretty fit under these clothes._

_Wally: I work out sometimes. Trust me, I'd love to do…this. But I have to ask, are the drugs really worth it to you?_

Dick hissed into the mic. He couldn't believe Wally had just asked her that, what was he thinking? The girl would figure him out in a heart beat if she was smart.

_Diamond: It's…not like that. I mean…I know I have a problem…but I have nothing else. We don't have places to go. These people take care of us…the drugs are our freedom._

_Wally: I understand…_

Dick watched as the man that was supposed to keeping his eyes on him, started to walk over to Wally's vehicle.

"In coming bro," Dick informed him quickly.

_Wally: You know, forget talking. Kiss me._

_Diamond: huh?_

"Huh?" Dick repeated harshly. He saw the man cup his hands over his eyes and peer into the passenger window. Dick knew exactly what he was seeing then. He'd practically heard teeth clank together when Wally had pulled the prostitute into a kiss. After the man finally left, Dick ordered Wally to give Diamond her money and watched her exit the car and return to her post. Wally drove away, Dick assumed to their hotel. In a few hours, Dick would find Maggie and meet him there.

* * *

"We're in." Maggie told the boy wonder. After finding a place for his pod of teens, the two met back up in their motel to join Wally. Dick snickered seeing the red head passed out on the bed they shared.

"Here's the address and the rules they expect you to follow." The witch said, handing Dick a folded piece of paper. He opened it up and looked in it.

"How do I ask them when? How do I find them?" he said, noticing the not didn't give a date or time. Maggie half grinned at him, rose red lips catching his attention.

"They find you." Maggie said with a nod.


	3. Author'sNote

Okay I'm sorry it's been a while! I will have this next chapter up by tomorrow night at the latest! At least I freakin' hope so! I love you all and I'm letting you know I'm still here!


	4. Dick's Mentor

_**I'm soooooooooo sorry! Please don't be too made at me! Here it is! I hope the next chapter doesn't take so long but no promises. School is taking up more of my time than I thought it would so these chapters aren't going to get out as fast as they did over the summer. This is kind of a sucky chapter btw, I'm sorryyyyyy.**_

* * *

"Jeeze Dick, calm down. I mean, I like the attention and even the jealousy…but I'm not gonna last long…" Wally inhaled deeply, "if you keep this up…" he groaned, bucking his hips towards the younger teen. He sighed with relief and some disappointment when Dick crawled up next to him, a satisfied look on his face as he left the speedster teased. It had been two days since the charade with the prostitute and Dick hadn't been shy at all about making Wally understand he was a taken man. It was the perfect opportunity because Maggie was away for the evening, up to something she insisted on keeping private. Of course, Dick didn't really doubt Wally, but he couldn't help the jealousy imagining his boyfriend kissing someone else. As if reading his mind, Wally chuckled, leaning over to nip at Dick's lower lip.

"I'm gay babe. I promise. You're the one that needs to be worried about. You still like girls." He teased, watching the growing blush on Dick's cheeks.

"I love you Wally," Dick said with fast recovery as he tugged the older boy on top of him, "now can you please suck-"

And with that, the door to the motel room swung open. Dick tensed at the sight of the five males crowding into the room and could feel Wally tense up as he kept his position protectively over Dick's smaller body. With little guilt, Dick shoved the red head off of him and sat up, thanking whatever force had put it into his head that he should keep his brown contacts in, even though Wally had complained about it. He scanned the men, recognizing silently that each of them carried openly placed guns, and assuming each hid at least two other weapons somewhere on their figures. Dick wasn't worried about a single one of them and he knew Wally wasn't either. Still, he knew he should at least act like the muscled men and freshly loaded guns frightened him a little.

One man, one Dick recognized as the younger man from the strip club, looked between him and Wally with what looked like a hint of disgust. Dick didn't care what the man though, but he did hope that none of these men recognized Wally as the man from the car the other night.

"He's not one of ours…" one of them pointed out. Wally stood up, not caring who saw him tug on his boxer shorts.

"He's also not being paid to do this…" he snorted with an arrogant sound, looking for his clothes in the pile he and Dick had tossed down not long ago. Dick noticed that Wally didn't give any of the men a good chance to look at his face. Even though he couldn't speed his way out of there, the red head could definitely maneuver his way out of room. It relieved Dick that his boyfriend played everything off so well and he could relax knowing that the men hadn't gotten a good look at him.

"So…" Dick tugged on his own clothes nonchalantly, "You must be 'them'…" he said with a smirk. Dick tried not to give away how comfortable he was. Five grown men with weapons should scare any normal teenager getting involved in such a dangerous and risky business, but of course it didn't bother Dick at all. He knew very well he could take these men out in half a minute, but he tried to make himself come across at least a little nervous. He purposely started tapping his foot and fidgeting.

Dick hadn't gone into this blind by any means. He'd found these men the second Maggie told him about it. But he'd had to play along and not go 'looking' for these people. Dick also knew that one man, a tall African American with dread locks to his hips, was the big boss. He had on a purple suit, and gold hoops in both ears. He grinned at Dick.

"I've been informed that you want in Jason. There are some rules…of course…" he said with a wave of his hand. Dick nodded.

"Of course." He copied.

"Don't ask questions. Don't date our…employees…not that I'm too worried about any of our women now…" the man cackled, "You aren't allowed to emotionally bond with them. You must listen. There is no room for mistakes. And Jason, I recommend you don't get caught around these parts with other men. Bludhaven isn't a very friendly city," the man finished.

"Right," Dick answered, licking his dry lips. He was given a new supply of dime sized bags with white powder inside. This was the boss though and Dick knew he had him nailed. But he couldn't bust him right now, not while he was still "Jason". Inwardly, he smiled.

* * *

2 days later…at Mount Justice…

Dick peeled off his mask as he collapsed on the sofa in front of his teammates. They were pretty surprised to him around since he was away so often and none of them had known about his undercover mission. He was tired and ready for a long hot shower, a drink, and a nap, but unfortunately it was the middle of the day and there was an explanation to give. He at least owed his team that much.

_God I'm anxious._

_What's wrong with me?_

_I need…_

"Where the hell have you been? We've been busting our butts off here." Conner growled at the boy. Dick groaned and wiped his face with his gloved hand.

"I was on an undercover mission from Batman. Had to nail a ring leader. I got him…so…mission accomplished." He said as he closed his eyes. Megan floated over to him, her eyes full of concern.

"What's wrong Robin?" she asked as sweetly as she could manage. Dick shot up and glared at her.

"Don't call me that. My name is Dick Grayson. I don't have a mask on do I?" he told her, then shook his head in regret, "Sorry…I'm just exhausted…"

…_or something…_

_Why did I do that?_

_Why can't I think straight?_

_Straight…straight…straight…_

_Gay…gay…gay…_

_Me…Wally._

_Wally…_

"Hey…maybe you should lay back down Dick…you looking sick…" it was Artemis. She was talking and Dick could hear her…but her voice sounded farther and farther away. And she was slowing down in a way. Dick stood up and looked around. He could see Kaldur and Artemis come to his sides to support him. Megan and Conner were trying to ask him questions but he chose to ignore them instead of paying attention. There was no way he was going to put his energy into listening to their worries, but he wasn't sure why he chose it that way.

"You're in so much trouble…" the voice belonged to the newly arriving hero, Kid Flash. He was staring at Dick. Actually he was glaring. Dick was sure of it. There was no way for him to deny what he knew the older boy was seeing. What was he seeing? Dick grabbed at his clouding head.

_Why?_

_Why?_

_Why?_

_He's so angry…_

_No…he's hurting…_

_I did it…_

_And all I can think about…_

_Is getting my hands on…_

_Another line…_

"You think I don't know what it looks like to come down from coke?" Wally growled as he sat his now undressed partner on their bed. They were in Wally's apartment and by this time, Dick was at a point where he was finally coherent again. He watched as Wally sped back and forth in the room, grabbing at his own red hair.

"Wally…" he tried to interrupt the speed talking.

"No! You know what it did to me Dick! You know how bad it is!" Wally yelled at him.

"I'm fine Wally…I just thought it might help…" Dick answered calmly.

"Help? That's what I'm here for Dick! Bats is going to ruin me for this. You drink like the world is going to end and now you're on drugs?" Wally hissed, stopping in front of the Wayne ward. The red head started breathing deeply, but slowed down to a calm after watching Dick's eyes grow shameful.

"I know you're hurting. I've been there…I'm still there. but this isn't the way…you know that." Wally said sternly, though with more compassion. The hero was helping Dick undress and then starting undressing himself. Dick watched the boy he loved. He admired Wally so much for all of the things he'd been through and dealt with. It amazed him to believe that Wally really was happy after all of his hell. He made Wally happy…in the beginning, but now he wasn't sure if he was just causing him more pain. He knew in the back of his head, if he didn't get it together, he was going to lose the older boy.

"I want you to talk to me Dick…tell me what's really going on inside of you." Wally said, now stripped down to his white briefs he'd worn with his costume, "Is it me?"

"What?" Dick asked, his head snapping up at the question.

"I know you're dealing with being gay. I know the media has made it hard on you. I also know that I'm your first boyfriend. I know that I'm the only one you've slept with. And you're really young…" Wally told him quietly from where he was standing. He sighed and gave into the desire to sit next to Dick, and the boy wonder leaned his head onto Wally's bare chest.

"I mean that you weren't like me. Aren't like me. I have been in other relationships, with boys and girls. I've had time to make up my mind about things, and I fell in love with you a long time ago. I'm sure you're curious about what it would be like to be with someone else. Like a girl." Wally half laughed at his own words. Dick tensed, not knowing what to say to the red head. It felt like his heart had jumped out of his chest, but he couldn't tell if it was because he was shocked by what Wally had said, or if it was because his boyfriend…might actually be right.

"It's only natural Dick. I'm not going to lie, sex with a woman is a lot different than with a man. Maybe…I mean…I really love you…god, I love you Dick Grayson. But if you need out…" Wally's voice clicked to a stop and Dick managed to move at least two feet away, completely surprised.

"What are you saying Wally?" he demanded. Wally half smiled, but it didn't completely transfer to his eyes and he took Dick's hands in his own. But before he could say anything, Dick interrupted him, yanking his hands away and standing up.

"No, you're not going to break up with me!" he yelled, something he rarely did, "So I'm curious? Who wouldn't be? It doesn't mean I don't want to be with you! There's a lot on my mind lately. Bruce and I have been fighting a lot, and of course I'm fighting this drinking problem. It's hard…and then when it comes to us…we have no privacy. I'm not ashamed to be with you Wally…I'm just afraid that somehow…you're going to be taken away. We've been attacked by the public more than we have by our own enemies. Is it too selfish that I want the perks of a normal relationship?"

"Dick…" Wally said, standing to join him, "We're not normal to start with. We're super heroes. And you're a celebrity. A gay, rich, celebrity. And me, the terrible influence and poor victim of his dad's abuse and rape, is dating you. What kind of normal are you looking for?" he asked. Dick groaned.

"I don't know…being able to go out and eat at a nice restaurant without ending up in a newspaper. Being able to kiss you in public without being stared at. Maybe even…" then Dick cut himself off, feeling a heated blush rise to his face. Wally raised an eyebrow.

"Maybe what?" he asked.

"Maybe…even…getting…married…someday…" Dick stuttered. He absolutely refused to look up at the speedster, there was just no way he could swallow his embarrassment. He was sure the jokester would laugh or push him away. Instead he felt Wally pull him into a tight embrace, hot skin wrapped around him. Dick was surprised to feel the shaking of his boyfriend's shoulders and wasn't sure if Wally was crying or laughing. Maybe it was a little of both. Dick felt himself being lifted and placed roughly on the bed.

He watched Wally climb on top of him, and Dick didn't try to take control this time. This time he trusted himself to the speedster, knowing there was nothing to really fear. He closed his eyes, Wally's tongue was running up his neck and greedy kisses were placed along his jaw line and lips. It was easy to get lost in the ecstasy of Wally's hot skin, his heavy breathing, his skilled and knowing hands travelling around him. Dick shivered slightly as his boxers were removed and he and Wally climbed underneath the blanket

Dick wasn't sure exactly what he was feeling. He was sick from coming down, excited from the electric touches of pleasure Wally was giving him, and filled with an overwhelming need to get his emotions out. Desperately, he reached up and clung to Wally's skin. There wasn't a soul in the world he would rather be with at that moment.

"Just let it out babe…It's just us…" Wally whispered seductively before letting his teeth close gently around one of Dick's nipples, eliciting a small whine. Dick squirmed, a little uncomfortable with the unusual submissive position he was in. Still, he liked how the older boy was taking charge. Looking into the pair of loving green eyes, Dick reached up and landed a kiss on Wally's lips, then pressed his tongue inward, forcing its way in.

Wally gently put his hands behind the backs of Dick's knees and forced his legs apart before going down on him, telling Dick he wasn't allowed to close his legs. This was actually very easy for the acrobat due to his flexibility. But it was challenging to concentrate on as he was getting head from his lover. Dick didn't bother holding back his moans. Dick was cut off though when two of Wally's fingers went into his mouth. Happily, Dick lubricated the digits with his saliva, rolling his tongue over them. Then he tried to relax as the wet fingers dipped out of his sight.

Dick could feel Wally's lips curl into a distorted smile around his member. It was because the speedster was successful in getting the boy wonder to moan loudly for him and it continued as he pumped his fingers. Dick shivered at the familiar, amazing feelings his body was having.

_Wally's amazing…_

_He's such a man now…_

_Well he always has been…_

_But…_

_He's happier, more confident._

_I love him so much…_

_God…_

_Please help me…_

_Get better…_

"Wally!" Dick screamed as he came. His hands were entangled in the speedster's red hair, holding him in place. Dick could feel his face overheating as he watched Wally come up and watched him swallow the substance. Without a warning, Wally took the younger teen and Dick let himself cry out.

* * *

Dick licked his lips nervously before entering the mansion he used to call his home. It was still his home, but more and more often, he found himself being less and less comfortable being there. He was definitely enjoying being with Wally more than his guardian. The older that Dick got, the less he and Bruce were seeing eye to eye. No longer did he want to be the Batman. No longer did he want to be the person who sacrificed and risked everything for the sake of a mission, no matter how noble.

It wasn't hard to smile at the familiar and refreshing sight of his butler approaching. Alfred, who was way more than a butler really, had in his hand a cup of tea that Dick could smell from across the room. He took the cup gratefully and sipped it, the warm liquid temporarily sating his dry throat.

"Where is he?" Dick asked, taking another glance around him.

"Master Bruce has gone to Peru for a conference. He'll be indisposed for the weekend and leaves his trust in you Master Richard." Alfred answered, stepping to the side as Dick walked by him. Dick didn't mean to be rude to his old family friend, but was disappointed knowing he couldn't talk to his guardian at that moment.

Collapsing on his large bed with a sigh, Dick groaned into his pillow before flipping over to stare at the ceiling. He honestly couldn't say exactly how he planned to talk to Bruce, but Wally had threatened him that morning. He had to tell Bruce about his problem, though both Dick and Wally were nearly positive the detective knew already. Still, Dick thought that if anyone could help him get in control, it was Batman. Despite the problems they were having, he knew Bruce loved him and he knew he could trust him. Still…Bruce was away.

_I'm alone right now…_

_There's no one to catch me…_

_Not until it's too late anyways…_

_That craving has been gnawing at me…_

_Alfred wouldn't be able to do anything…_

_And KF is with Flash in Central…_

_He would be angry at me…_

_No, not anger…heart break._

_Wally would be heart broken._

_Just one line…_

_Just a few drinks…_

Dick wiped the residue from his nose and upper lip. Now he was on to the bottle of vodka. It was long ago that he lost the need for a chaser, lost the sensitivity to the burning sensation it caused going down his throat. Actually, he was sure he'd have a hold in his throat by now. Still, the liquid went down smoothly as he took it straight from the bottle. It was warm and familiar, comfort with a sense of danger. Soon, the guilt would pass he knew. Soon, he wouldn't be able to feel the hurt, the confusion, the hidden anger. Because that's what getting cross faded did for him. The perfect pain killer. The perfect pain killer that he knew was killing him in the process and as much as he knew it, he couldn't seem to stop.

Wally had always said Dick could drink a large amount for a normal human. Wally didn't get drunk, his metabolism burned the alcohol off way too fast. Dick was jealous, but at the same time, he could imagine the frustration Wally must've had wishing he could drink away his sorrows. It made Dick so angry with himself that he was oblivious when Wally was being abused. The speedster had been so good at hiding it for such a long time. Dick never felt the desire to hide anything and he thought maybe it was because he had to hide the most important part of himself, his identity. Of course there was a little weight lifted when he could show himself to his teammates. Dick was up front with his problems, he talked to Black Canary like everyone else. He didn't try to hide the way Wally did, or the way Artemis lied about her family, and he didn't choose to hide who he was like Megan, and he didn't feel like an inadequate super hero like Conner.

Dick looked at his cell phone, trying to focus on the moving buttons. Moving. Everything was moving, spinning, dancing in front of his eyes. He read the name on the screen. How long had it been since he'd started wasting himself? A few minutes? No…a few hours? More than a few? He wasn't sure. He picked up the phone and pressed the green talk button.

"Dick? Hello?" the voice asked, "what are you doing?"

"Babs…" that's all Dick could really manage.

"What's wrong? Are you…okay?" the girl asked, her voice full of concern. Dick tried to concentrate on the feminine voice, let it relax him. He wasn't sure what he answered but Barbara hung up, saying she was on her way over. Dick was kind of relieved because at least it wasn't Wally who was going to see him, but at the same time, he wasn't sure he wanted his ex-girlfriend and occasional partner in crime fighting to see him either. By the time she got to his house, Dick was starting to feel sick.

"You're drunk?" Barbara gasped, looking at the half empty bottle of vodka on the floor. She pinched her nose in disgust as she walked over to Dick.

"Babs…I have…to tell…to tell…you something." Dick said as he stumbled back onto his bed. Barbara glared at him, but sat by his side.

"What?" she asked him.

"I'm gay…" Dick answered. Barbara rolled her eyes at him.

"I know. Everyone knows that." She snorted.

"But…I like girls too. So I'm not gay."

"Then you're a bisexual. Please don't tell me this is why you're drunk? Come on Dick, we need to get you in bed." Barbara answered, standing up to encourage her friend to sleep.

"What if I sleep with a girl? Will things…things change?" Dick asked, laying under his blanket.

"Don't say stupid things Dick. You love Wally West remember?" Barbara tried to assure him. Dick grabbed her wrist as it went to his bedside light and stopped her.

"No. If he was a girl, it would be different. Easier." He said loudly. Barbara sighed before turning away from the young hero.

"Love isn't easy," she nearly whispered, "I'll call Bruce." And the lights were out and Dick was alone. He felt more alone at that moment then he had in a long time. But his head was swimming and his body was spinning in circles. A still spinning he couldn't ever explain.

_Love isn't easy…_

_Love isn't easy… _

_Love is hard…_

_Love is hard…_

_Then why…do I love?_

_Why do people love?_

_Why? _

_Why does Wally love me?_

_Why do I hurt him if I love him?_

_I love him…right?_

_I love Wally…_

_I love Wally…_

_It's not easy…_

_Loving him isn't easy…_

_Love isn't easy…_

_Love is…love…_

* * *

It wasn't often that Dick felt uncomfortable talking to Black Canary about his problems, usually he was relieved to have the weight removed from his shoulders. Today though was entirely different though because she insisted that Bruce join them. Dinah believed there was an obvious lack of communication, a huge deal between any super hero and his partner. Not being able to communicate could mean someone's death during a mission. Black Canary instructed Dick to talk to Bruce and she would mediate if necessary between them.

It wasn't like Bruce was really a heartless terror, Dick knew better. Of course Bruce loved him and came rushing back as soon as he heard his ward was having a terrible melt down with substance abuse. Still, Dick wondered if it would be different if Bruce had been Batman instead. He wondered if he himself was one of those sacrifices that his guardian would give up if he had to.

"Dick…" Bruce started, then cleared his throat, "I don't know why you would turn to drinking. I've shown you the ways to cope with things that are bothering you. I've had you trained so you wouldn't end up bitter like me. I though maybe you'd go on a rampage against villains though…not a drinking binge."

"It wasn't just a binge…I've been meaning to tell you…" Dick replied carefully, "I drink. I've…been drinking…for months now…" he admitted. He swept his palms through his dark ebony hair and blinked his blue eyes rapidly before looking up to the billionaire.

"Why?" was all the man asked.

"A lot of reasons I guess…I'm stressed out. I'm worried all of the time. Everything is conflicting. With being Dick Grayson the playboy kid, being Robin, becoming a leader, being gay, having to put Wally in the spot light all of the time. I wish I had just kept pretending to be straight if only for his sake. Hell, I don't even know if I'm gay or straight to be honest. And then there's you…" and then Dick stopped. He was having this conversation…this real life conversation…with his mentor. It was like one of those weird talks he usually had with Wally or even Black Canary every now and then. This wasn't about any villain or mission. This was personal. And suddenly he found he was very afraid of what the man in front of him, the man who raised him, was about to say.

Not to Dick's surprise, Bruce Wayne dismissed Dinah from the room and sat down next to his ward. For a long time, the two just stared at each other. Read each other, like only trained detectives could do.

"I know it's hard…to pretend all of the time. To be something you aren't. Coming out of the closet to the public was the one really honest thing you've been able to do, through no fault of your own. I don't care if you're gay, straight, bisexual. It's just a label. Like whoever you want to Dick. And if you love Wally, then the rest doesn't matter. He understands when you're in public with women. He understands when your picture ends up in the paper. And he definitely knows the hardships of life, he can handle this." Bruce explained, "but maybe you can't."

"What…do you mean?" Dick asked him.

"I've know you've been drinking. I even know you've been using drugs. I hoped you would be able to help yourself…but I think it's safe to say you need and want help," Bruce replied sternly, "So I'm giving you time off. You need a break from the hero life. And I know…that you disagree with a lot of what I do. So go think."

"Go?"

"Take your boyfriend on a trip. Go do something that isn't going to stress you out. No drinking, no drugs, no powers, no paparazzi." Bruce said with half a grin.

"Where am I supposed to go do that?"

"How's space sound to you?"


End file.
